Wednesday, January 14, 2009

Comic Sans is for Whores

It's cold and flu season, folks. And shockingly, I am not sick. Or maybe I am, and just too used to it to notice. Sometime around Christmas I stopped feeling the effects of the four month plague I acquired from hooking up repeatedly with a special ed teacher in an especially hickish district in the area. The second I stopped that shit, miraculously I ceased to be sick. Apparently he was a carrier monkey for whatever diseases those little window lickers brought to class from their trailer parks. Wow, am I PC or what?

I digress. The purpose of this rambling post is to once again share my brilliance with the world. Presenting Kate's Fucking Kick Ass Flu Cocktail:A double shot of vodka (go big or go home, bitches)
Muchos icecubes
Tomato juice or V-8
Dashes of Tabasco, Worcestershire, and pepper (as much as your running nose inspires)
2 T Day Quil

Garnish with a celery stock, or a Get Better Bear lollypop if you're feeling crazy. Mmm. Goes down smooth. Sit back and just feel the germs running for cover.

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